As Mom struggles with even basic tasks, like bathing herself, washing her hair, and other things that we take for granted, one of the things she, her doctor and I must watch out for are “exacerbations.” With COPD, the downhill progression of the disease is marked by these sudden flare-ups, and each time the post-recovery baseline is set a little lower. Typically, a cardiac event or exacerbation is what causes death.
There is a well-known correlation between stress and exacerbations. In addition, stress, anxiety, and depression are almost universal in end-stage COPD patients.
In Mom’s case, the efforts by Dysfunctional Bob and Jeff “Sugarland” Chiow to try to drag her into court have caused both extensive anxiety and several flare-ups.
So, if you had any doubt whatsoever as to the ethics and Christian values — whether of Bob and Jeff, the vestry, or Grace Church itself — their willingness to hound a dying woman speaks more loudly than any other testimony that they could offer. And Jeff’s blatant bullcrap about how Mom was getting around in February conveniently ignores a basic reality of COPD called, “incurable progressive disease.”
In other words, Jeff and Bob are not just lacking in Christian values, they also are incredibly stupid if they assume Mom’s condition hasn’t worsened since last February, both due to the passage of time and their own conduct.
If there is a hell, there surely is a special place in it for clergy, lawyers, vestry members and churches that bully the dying, and for diocesan officials who turn a blind eye to that conduct.
I surely hope Bob’s mother didn’t have to deal with assholes like these two as she was dying.